Hello friends! It's Thursday night again and chatting with the #fmfparty crew this evening. I always get a chuckle and tonight's was from a friend who "may" need bail money! LOL Not really but it cracked me up! 

Every week we get together and share our Faith with prayers, words of encouragement and inspiring women that lift one another up. It's a wonderful party on Twitter and I encourage you to join us! 

Tonight Kate has chosen the word BREAK. We have 5 minutes of unedited, fast typing as we listen to our hearts as God supplies us with what message He has put upon us to write. 

Ready, set, GO!  

If you have followed my posts, you know that domestic violence is a huge passion of mine. When I saw the word 'break' I instantly knew what I was going to write about. How far can one push another until they break? Battered women and children often feel broken in a world that (until recently) has been hushed. "I love him," she pleads to her friend. "He doesn't mean it" she defends him. Until the next night when he has a gun to her nose asking if she wants him to pull the trigger. When would YOU break?
Last Saturday I spoke to a group of Christians regarding my childhood. Before I went up to the podium I was shaking uncontrollably. Honestly, I don't know why- it wasn't the first time I ever spoke about my upbringing. But this time was different and I knew it. Afterwards, I saw the faces of those women that my message effected, and I hurt for each one of them. All I could do was offer hope and a place of refuge... Our Lords loving arms. You see, women who's been abused can be weak and filled with fear. They aren't sure who to trust and opening talk about what goes on behind closed doors. So, God used my story to shed the shame of abuse, to be a beacon of light for salvation, and the courage to be bold enough to speak the truth. 

God won't let us break. Why? Because when we turn to Him for our needs, He. Will. Provide. Even as a child and into my teens I thought I couldn't go on. I sunk to my knees and begged Him, "Please Lord, Please, Save me from the violence." Looking back it reminds me of Paul's own battle. Three times he begged God to take it away. And our Creator said, 

Paul goes on to save one of my favorite, most powerful statements I have ever found...

If you find yourself living in an abusive home, I sincerely encourage you to seek His refuge. Ask your local churches if they offer Bible studies or support groups. Speak with a Christian counselor or Pastor. Don't let another day slip through your fingers believing that's its your fault...because it's not!!! And most importantly- pray. Ask God to lead you, to carry you- He already loves you - let Him help you so you begin to mend from your brokenness. 


Find refuge in His arms
-Shannon 

Here is yet another week of  Five Minute Friday where uplifting women gather together on Twitter for a session of encourage, laughter, and really cool ideas. I somehow managed to miss the videos they've been doing and I gotta say, it's such an amazing idea to get to know the women we chat with every week. To hear ones voice makes everything that more real. It builds a connection with the face and words we see on screen. Kudo's ladies :) 

Last week, I made a vow that I was going to stop letting all the difficulties I've been dealt get to me. And this week I am very happy to say, I'm focused and poised. Praise God! 

This is when we are given our writing prompt and given 5 minutes to write freely about what's on our heart. So, without further procrastination, our word is: REAL

Recently, I have been in awe of what the Lord has been doing in my life. I sometimes think I need to pinch myself to make sure I'm still alive and breathing. That's it's not some sort of dream or fairy-tale I've been in. Is this real I ask myself? How can God use someone as myself with such sin and shame? For years I hid my past and wouldn't budge on revealing it especially to the public. Maybe a close friend or two but that was pushing it. And my husband and children? How would they react if I stood in front of a group of people and talked about the demons that would haunt my dreams? I know in about every post, I mention something to do with this... but you see, I must because God has shown me such mercy and grace and I want everyone to know they can have it too! He is our REAL LIVING GOD who works in each of us for a very specific purpose. We each have our duties to fulfill and this Saturday marks yet another milestone in my walk of faith. I'll be speaking at my church (I'm pretty new to this church that God has placed me at). It's a women's breakfast and the ladies have asked me to be their guest speaker. God has truly granted me this blessing and it will be the launch of the ministry Refuge Under the Willow. I;m nervous and very excited all at once. This will be my 4th time speaking however it feels like it's the most important one I'll ever do and I don't know why because I would think the 1st one was the one that made all this happen in the first place. 

STOP

I don't know what all God has up His sleeve but as long as it's His will for me, I am remaining obedient and following the path He is leading me. I pray each one of you are able to reach out and take His hand knowing He will guide you along this journey.

Prayer & Love Always,
-Shannon 

Thursday night, a time when a group of fabulous women connect on Twitter- it's an evening that I can sit down and unwind-let go of all of my worries and release the burdens of the week. I've noticed over the last few weeks, I've had some heaviness on my heart for one reason or the other. I yearn for the weeks prior where I had very little stress and felt absolutely wonderful. So, I ask myself what's changed? Why have I let the ways of the world dictate my usual happy spirit and transform my smile into anxiety and feeling overwhelmed? Because I have let the darkness slip it's dirty claws around my thoughts...

When I walk, I think. The winter has been harsh and I haven't take the time to explore the outside this entire season. Last night I was able to take that walk and talk with a great friend.  I love how nature rejuvenates my spirit! It's time to revert those thoughts back to being like a child of faith. Pure. Holy. Light. Love. Back to the way Jesus taught so many years ago as He tells us in Matthew 18:3. 'And he said: "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." NIV So, tonight I am determined to pull up this anchor, adjust the sails, and head towards the light.

Tonights writing prompt is PLAN. I'm sure many posts will mirror where I'm going to go with this but it's a great topic that can be discussed in a variety of ways. I look forward to reading all the fellow writers found over at Kate's

Remember, 5 minutes, unedited, free writing that flows from the clicking of keys from your heart to the screen.

GO!

I had always wanted to write a book and I attempted to do so many times, failing miserably. Nothing every felt right. But I kept trying and getting frustrated. I'd stop and try again only to get frazzled with my words because they just weren't "it". It had no wow factor and felt lame. When I turned 30, that all changed and a book began to flourish. I knew what I had started was something special. It felt right, so I knew this was the "one". All those years prior, all those attempts were part of my timing; not His. After almost 2 years of writing, I was nearing the end of the book. That's when the Lord gave me a glimpse of what was to come. I put the hope on the back burner for 3 years. I knew this was His plan...not mine. And I remained hopeful that it would flourish to life like a lily blooming in early July. It's delicate petals requires nurturing. The roots become firmly planted in the ground over time. It requires water and light so that it will grow tall and strong to withstand the wind and rain once it blossoms. And just like the lily, a ministry needs to grow, to be nurtured, watered with roots firmly planted, and the light brighter than the sun. It took 3 years of waiting, learning, relying, and trusting and I'm very excited to announce the start of a new ministry that's been place on my heart to lead. Refuge Under the Willow will be consisted of Bible studies that look at various aspects of domestic violence. It will refer to scripture and lessons written about a variety of topics such as God's love, shame, abuse, alcoholism, submitting, salvation, and many more. Along the way, I fell into the trap of turning His PLAN into my plan. Needless to say, my plan was smashed into the ground and some very valuable lessons were learned. For that I am thankful because it has taught me very valuable wisdom. I pray that as I continue my walk with the Lord that I always reach His light, love and truth.






STOP

In the midst of my angst, I'm reminded of Romans 12:11-12  "Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying." NLT 

Hope for His Plan...Love His Plan...Rejoice His Plan...Glorify His Plan...Live His Plan -- because His Plan is perfect

My dear friends, I pray that God is the splendor of your world. 

-Shannon 

Tonight, my friends, I write with a heavy heart. My 9 year old daughter who is usually a happy girl filled with lots of giggles and her love for Jesus shines brightly. However, this evening her heart was broken. Due to her mini meltdown of crying and asking why while trying to explain the hurt and frustration through the tears that has overcome her spirit, I wasn't able to join in the weekly conversation on twitter tonight. So, I headed over to Kate's blog to find our writing prompt. Tonight's word is Gather. 

As a back story to what I am about to write:
My daughter has an eye condition called coloboma. It's rare and happens around the 5 week mark of gestation. During that time, the eye lids are supposed to close to form the baby's eyes. However, on the rare occasion those eye lids doesn't fully close and leaves slits. When that happens parts of the eye or eyes are not formed. In my daughters case, both of her eyes are effected and she is missing part of her iris' leaving her pupil to make up for the empty space. She has what is sometimes called "key-hole shaped" pupils. What's this mean? It varies with every case. With my little girl, she has peripheral vision loss as well as a 40% chance of spontaneous retinal detachment. If she would get hit in the face (eye area especially) that chance increases dramatically because the muscles that hold the iris in place are weaker than the average persons. So, due to this risk, she isn't in sports such as basketball, soccer, softball, volleyball, etc. I am also aware that accidents happen so even a simple poke in the eye may cause damage. I also know that I can't exactly keep our daughter in a bubble and we have to put our trust in the Lord for protection. With that being said here is my 5 minutes of unedited free style writing of whats on my heart. Go...

Something happened where an opportunity to play in a soccer game was set in Jeanie's mind. I knew that I didn't want her in any soccer game due to the risks. However, the decision wasn't solely up to me. I have a husband and a daughter to reason with. To me, it was a no brainer. NO! To him the sad eyes and a spark of hope for her to play laid on his heart wanting to give our little girl whatever she wanted. So, our decision was to ask the doctor. (Plus we needed clearance for other reasons) Today was the day and the news was not in their favor but mine.  That two letter word sent my daughters heart into the depths of despair. The hurt was poured out onto my shirt with every tear that dripped down. She stated how upset she is with her limitations to sports. How she feels left out and how I can't understand her because her eye disease is permanent. "It's forever, Mom." And she reminded me of the fact that I can't change that. Talk about pulling my heart out- this was one of those nights. We spent a great deal of time talking. I had no true words of comfort instead I offered her teachings from our Lord. So, I gathered my thoughts and I reassured her that she will not have this forever. That her eyes will be restored and perfect once she is in Heaven. And I told her a story- one that I haven't spoke of in depth until tonight. I was able to tell her I understood her disappointments. I took that story and weaved it into another one that she knows of but again- not as in depth as it actually is. I offered her a hope- God will take all bad things and turn it into His good. That he has a plan and purpose and although we may not know now, she will know when the time is right. I gave her some possibilities of what it could be (even a miracle that her eyes would be cured) but only He knows what He plans. So, my prayer tonight is for my daughter. Father, I ask that you be with Jeanie. That you offer her comfort in her time of despair. Lord I ask that you blanket her with peace so that she may let go of her hurt and anger. And God I ask for strength as she wakes up in the morning ready to face a new dawn. Gracious God, I know you have a plan. And I know you will use this for Your good. Please Lord, be with my little girl tonight and all the rest of her days providing that hope that one day her eyes will be without a disease or condition. I thank you for all that you do that we don't even see or notice and I thank you for loving us as you do. In Jesus' name -Amen

STOP

Often there are times when we must stop and do more than just listen- but feel. Especially when it comes to our children. Sometimes it could be a friend, a sister, or a cousin- but we are compelled to simply stop... Gather our thoughts and offer hope because that's the only thing we have. If I could wrap my arms around my daughter and all of her pain and suffering would diminish that would be a miracle. However, more times than I can count- God is working on building us to be something better. So, although I couldn't comfort my child and make her pain disappear, I reminded her of God's love and wondrous ways in which He works in each of us. I ask that the next time you are faced with a loved one filled with grief, gather your thoughts, pray, and let the Holy Spirit lead you so that He can do His work. 

-Shannon